Running....

I've been jogging and working out at the gym for almost four months now. I hesitate to share my experiences, though. The feelings I get when I know I'm doing well, are barely recognizable to me even when they repeat themselves; I wouldn't trust myself to convey them to anyone else.

One concrete discovery that I have made has reminded me, oddly enough, of when I quit smoking. It was almost four years ago and I got really sick. Fever, sore throat, raspy cough, etc. but I didn't go to the doctor because it was my first semester back to college and I was afraid of missing something. That and spending a day, deathly ill, in an empty library with hot chocolate was so much more inviting than spending a day, deathly ill, at home with a 1 and 2 year old. Those few, who I may have infected, must please pardon my plight.

During those 3 days that I was sufficiently saturated in Tylenol, it was hell to smoke. My throat felt like fire when I tried, so I didn't. After three long days I had the choice to light up but decided not to. What was one more day? I kept my pack in my purse until it seemed absurd to have them and not smoke them. I moved them to my glove compartment always thinking, "just incase." Eventually they rested in my desk drawer at home and there they stayed for over a year until I just threw them out.

Sure, every now and then, I had a puff. Bryson quit a whole year after me so, of course, I gave in once or twice. It usually served to remind me what, exactly, I wasn't missing. I noticed the way my food tasted better, my lungs felt better and I stopped hacking in the morning. The habit was gone and it never came back.

I think that is how I am treating this new habit of working out. Or maybe I should say, "the old habit of not working out." I've decided to change, but I keep my bigger clothes around for those off days. I take a break sometimes and allow myself to fall back or fail a little, but all it does is remind me of what I wasn't missing.

I notice the subtle changes in my lifestyle, like how I sleep better, feel more comfortable even when just sitting, handle stress better, eat healthier.... oh shit, the list goes on and on... have better digestion (and elimination), smile more, laugh more, have greater self esteem, stand taller, have better sex

(I know that the sex thing and the elimination thing is going to be TMI to all of you who know me personally, but you're just gonna have to get over it, because this is full disclosure here and how the hell else do you sell something with out talking about sex and bowel movements? Have you seen these fucking commercials lately? Grow up.)

handle PMS better, handle 5 and 6 year old energy better, think clearer, detox faster after a night of too much wine, handle the heat better, handle the cold better.....

Did I mention that I feel FANTASTIC? Well, it's probably just a side effect.