No Brainer!

  I felt like such a fool about a year ago.  I was sitting on my cousin's porch and we were swapping advice on how to make a household run smoothly.  The subject turned to finance and my family was virtually debt free.  I say, "virtually" because we had the obvious mortgage and car payment, but we didn't have any credit card or hospital bills or anything like that.  I was telling her about how we had tons of debt when we first got married and how I figured out a system for paying it off.  What was this system?  She wanted to know. So I started to explain what we did and she burst in talking about some guy named Dave Ramsey.  (now would be a good time to mention that I haven't watched television, by choice, for nearly six years) I don't watch television, so my answer was, "Dave who?" and she proceeded to explain to me about the pyramid of payoff (putting the larger debts at the bottom, smaller at the top and as they get paid off, letting the money trickle down to the larger ones and so on).  I actually felt my cheeks get hot.  I made that system up for our budget back in 1999, the year we were married and moved to Germany, DIRT POOR.  Now I am not saying that old Dave stole anything from me, but I am saying this fella' sure as shit stole something from everyone else. And I was a tad jealous - only because this dude is RICH!  He got rich teaching these dimwitted people what they could have figured out on their own if they had just tried.  I even said, "He actually teaches how to do this?  Isn't it, sort of, common sense."  My cousin admitted that "yeah! It is common sense but maybe sometimes you just need someone to tell you.  You just need to hear it."  PSH!  Well, I just want everyone out their to know, that I've figured out a great many of these common sense - no brainers and for a small donation I would be willing to tell any one of you about them whenever you decide you "just need to hear it." Oh, but this pyramid business I'll give away for free!!!

I think I'll go ahead and write a book called, "Twelve Steps to Becoming a Peaceful Nation" (Spoiler alert! Step 12 is "don't go to war").  Then I'll publish, "If you don't like being fat, try eating less." Oh man, I should just by my house in the Hamptons now!